Making the impossible, possible.

I love our bedtime routine with Bailee.  Being that she is 18 months, she still loves to be rocked before being put into her bed.  I sing my heart out as I rock her.  My tune is terrible but she seems to enjoy it.  In her own gibberish, she will ask for me to sing.  I relish this time and know that before too long she will no longer need me to rock her.

Our routine has changed dramatically since 12-12-08.  Every evening since Grey has passed away, I do not rock her the same.  I begin singing and rocking her gently and soon, I find myself staring at her, smelling her and taking her scent in, and running my fingers through her hair that is freshly shampooed.  There is not one evening that I don't find myself thinking of Grey and his family.  I hold on a little longer, I rock a little more.  There is not one evening that I have wished she would go to sleep quickly.  

As I rock her tonight, I again thank Grey for the change in me.  Because of Grey, I am a better mom, and because of Grey I realize the frailty of life and just how precious it is.  

When things happen or don't go right for me, I think of Grey's family.  I think of what they endured during his illness, and what they continue to endure after his death.  I find myself thinking how the things that once upset me, are really not that important and how little those things compare to the magnitude of what his family is going through.  They are survivors.  They are surviving the unbearable.  

It makes me wonder, does God really give you the strength to endure?  They are a living example of the impossible being possible.

Chicago Here I Come!

I have been given an amazing opportunity by my school district!  During my Spring break, I am flying to Chicago for three days for a reading conference.  They are paying for everything.  The craziest thing is...... my aunt, Vicki Gibson (although my uncle and her divorced years ago, I still think of her as Aunt Vicki) is one of the presenters!  I am excited to have this opportunity!  I am at a point in my teaching career where I need rejuvenation.  I think this will help do that.  

At the beginning of my teaching career I went to all kinds of workshops.  Of course they were all within driving distance.  But being able to take a day and learn new things always rejuvenated me as a teacher.  For the past 6 years, our district has really cut back on all outside training and workshops.  Where they are getting the money to send about 8-10 of us to Chicago is beyond me. I am just thankful that I get to go!  

A cute cut, and the darn flu!

I don't really know if that is the case but.......  As you can tell Bailee got a trim.  She desperately needed it.  So Sunday Grammy, Bailee, and I had a girls day.  We went to church, out to eat, and headed into San Antonio for a hair cut.  We love to go to this particular place that specializes in children's cuts.  So as we are there waiting...... for almost two hours.... (next time we will have an appointment), Bailee plays with the toys in the waiting area.  Not only does she play with them she mouths them.  It drives me insane.  This is all new to me, because Brayden never put things in his mouth.

My obsessive compulsiveness kicked in high gear. As soon as she put the Lego in her mouth, I jumped as fast as I could to get it out.  Can you imagine the germs that are on those toys?  I have a hard, hard time letting my kiddos play with toys that are in waiting areas.  I have been known to hold my kids as they cry, because I won't put them down at the doctor's office, to play with their toys.  Poor Brayden knows to not even ask to play with them anymore.  I won't hear of it.  

So...... last night Bailee seems to not be herself.  This morning she seemed okay, so of course she went to the sitter.  I end up getting call at about 1:45.  Bailee was running a temp.  Because there had been another child that had been diagnosed with strep, I assumed she had it also.  I immediately called for an appointment.  We were booked for 2:20.

Well.... we get there.... and she had...... a fever, red throat, leaky gunky eyes, ear infection (this threw me for a loop because she has tubes that were put in this past summer), cough, and sneezing, and wheezing in chest.  Bailee was letting us know that she did not feel well and was not happy to be there.  She was just miserable.  All signs pointed to flu.  So we are on a ton of prescriptions, and I am planning on being up most of the night.   I look up flu on the Internet and guess what the incubation is..... 2 days.... hmmmm..... that would make it Sunday that she was exposed..... if we consider that she started showing symptoms last night...... Ugh!

While she does have a precious hair cut, she also has a horrible case of the flu.